Saturday, June 13, 2009

Challenging Gandhi

"Nobody can hurt me without my permission" as Gandhi says. I love the idea of this quote, and the magnitude of its independence. It is the true realm of being that isolates everyone and everything from true existence. I admire and love Gandhi for his many views of the world, human nature, and our path known as life. But while I wish this statement could be true, I challenge its sincerity. I wish I could be strong enough to smother my hurt emotions when they come rising. I wish I could dismiss the feelings I have. I wish I could stifle the tears when they come flowing. But, my reality is...I CAN'T.

My heart is too weak and my mind is too strong. I believe that someone can hurt you, without ANY consent. When you give your heart to someone, you give a part of you. You lay your beating, tender heart in the care of another because you deem it safe. So, then the person hurts you. You are hurt because a part of you exists with and in the other person. You mesh in a way that is not separate. Trust is a delicate emotion that can fracture on instant. Unfortunately, any crack or stress can hold future ramifications. I know we shouldn't relive the past, but why would we be designed to remember if we were not supposed to?

While I am the only one who can control my pain, I am not the gatekeeper for its admittance.

1 comment:

Jeni Jinx said...

I think I have to agree consent is usually not involved when it comes to hurt feelings!

-Jennifer